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Choosing Hope

August 19, 2010

This morning we opened prayer time at work listening to Blessed Be Your Name.

You give and take away, my heart will choose to say, Lord, blessed be your name.

And, I’ll admit, I was fighting back the tears.

I listen to Pandora almost all day long and heard “Make Your Feel My Love”…twice.

I’d go hungry, I’d go black and blue
I’d go crawling down the avenue
There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do
To make you feel my love

I think it was written as a love song but, for me, its about our kiddos (all three of the ones we have cared for and the ones yet to come).

And then I saw this on the Livesay’s blog:

Hope and despair are not opposites. They are cut from the very same cloth, made from the very same material, shaped from the very same circumstances.  Most of all, every life finds itself forced to choose one from the other, one day at a time, one circumstance after another.  The only difference between the two is that despair shapes an attitude of mind; hope creates a quality of soul. Despair colors the way we look at things, makes us suspicious of the future, makes us negative about the present.  Hope, on the other hand, takes life on its own terms, knows that whatever happens God lives in it, and expects that, whatever its twists and turns, it will ultimately yield its good to those who live it well. When tragedy strikes, when trouble comes, when life disappoints us, we stand at the crossroads between hope and despair, torn and hurting. Despair cements us in the present; hope sends us dancing around dark corners trusting in a tomorrow we cannot see.  Despair says that there is no place to go but here.  Hope says that God is waiting for us someplace else.  Begin again. (unknown author)

If it seems like we are doing well with our situation, it is because we have hope. It does not mean we are not sad. Sometimes I think some extra cuddles with T are a much better use of my time than making it to work by 9:00 am. I felt kind of bummed out when I realized I would not be dressing M in the new cute outfits I got her for the fall. Moments with them are bittersweet.

But we are daily choosing to be hopeful and optimistic. I could spend every day thinking about M & T leaving and worrying about their future but that is not fair to them or anyone else. Hope is a better option for us, for our families, for the kids and for their birth mother.

I love hope. I love that my God is the provider of hope. It is certainly the lesson that is being woven through this first year of foster parenting. As someone who is usually full of cynicism and doubts about people’s sincerity, hope is a welcome addition in my life.

I guess this would be the answer to the question, “How are you handling this?” We have hope. And, if you are a believer in Christ, it is yours for the taking.

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. Sara permalink
    August 20, 2010 2:23 pm

    Love this post! And that song gets me all them time, I don’t know that I’ve ever sang it or heard it without tears in my eyes (especially after losing my dad). As always, thanks for sharing!

  2. Meredith permalink
    August 21, 2010 8:06 pm

    Thank you for this post! I’m no stranger to having to chose between “hope and despair,” have failed miserably and not chosen wisely, all too often, and am grateful to see you guys making every effort to keep in mind an eternal perspective on this! Love you, both….a lot! 🙂

  3. Katie permalink
    August 22, 2010 10:15 am

    Thanks for this post. I needed to hear this today 🙂

  4. August 24, 2010 9:58 pm

    We have seen through several of our fostering situations just how different God’s ‘big view’ is compared to our tiny one. We have fretted outcomes for kids and then after the fact see it was the perfect answer – but only God knew that at the time. There is hope in our God – he loves these kids more than we ever could!

  5. August 25, 2010 11:44 pm

    Beautifully written. Your journey is very encouraging as we walk along a similar path…Praying for the transition and strength for you guys! And holding onto the hope with you!

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